Conspiracy theories

The fresh wound of ignominy inflicted by a senior bureaucrat (BPS-20), after he stole the wallet of the head of the Kuwaiti delegation, which had come to Pakistan to discuss a myriad of investment plans, has left the nation in a state of consternation. Questions are being raised as to why a senior official stoop to this nadir of immoral conscience. While we all waited for the answers, the rumour brigade came to the rescue of the bureaucrat and the nation, in a manner that would, serve as a face saving endeavour or at least mitigate its tarnishing effects. The conspiracy theorists gave the whole fracas a new façade to look at, and this side of the story had the touch of a James Bond story to it.

The alternate story tells us that the bureaucrat was on a spy mission ordained by one of our neighbouring countries, which is not enjoying cordial relations with Kuwait. The spy was placing a chip that would help the intelligence agency of that country extract some sensitive information from the delegate whose wallet was stolen. This astonishing story is absolute rubbish, as perhaps theorists believed that his crime of stealing would be more acceptable, if it was juxtaposed with spying.

But alas! the CCTV video revealed that our ‘James Bond’ was in his late 50s and his physical condition would not have allowed him to perform any actions that a spy is expected to attempt. Furthermore, was he not supposed to put the wallet back from where he picked up after planting the suggested chip? Then why was it recovered from his home, as was written in the FIR. Perhaps answers to these questions will take the air out of this balloon.

One may ask these so called custodians of ultimate truth, who present these theories with conviction, whether there is any specific agenda behind their endeavours. The answer is in the affirmative. The primary reason is to get attention from the public by divulging something which not many people know, and by sensationalising the issue they achieve this goal. Furthermore, it is also done to create a sense of uncertainty and fear that things are not in control. One of the frequently sold ideas, is that Pakistan would have been a super power today, had it not been for the Machiavellian manoeuvrings from Zionist or Indian quarters. Rather than holding ourselves responsible, we like to shift the onus of our ills on other nations and this is a perfect manifestation of cognitive dissonance.

The architects of these preposterous theories also play safe. Most of their stories either involve spy agencies like CIA, MOSSAD, RAW and ISI or leave the matter in a totally inaccessible realm of ghosts and aliens. They know that after stating something pertaining to the above mentioned entities, they will not have to corroborate their theory with verifiable facts, because neither spy agencies share any information, nor ghosts and aliens will come to testify their concocted stories. This makes it easier to propound anything and walk away, without being challenged, and today anyone can write a story with the last line saying forwarded as received, which further protects the source of the misinformation.

The concerning fact is that these fabricated stories are readily digested by people with lack of knowledge and a poorly developed approach to critical thinking. Children are usually inquisitive in nature and do question us about things, but mostly this crucial quality of theirs is quashed when they are told by their elders to do whatever they are told to do, instead of developing a healthy sense of curiosity. This leads to acceptance of certain notions without challenging their validity, and once this habit is ingrained in our subconscious mind, it is a daunting task to get rid of it.

Moreover, conspiracy theories are ubiquitous phenomenon, whether it was the moon landings or 9/11, the Illuminati secret society or mysterious disappearance of flight MH-370; we have all conspiracy theories catering to different segments of different societies. Majority is of the view that we are not allowed by institutions to know the truth, so when we are given information based on deducted analogies, we tend to fall for it as a lot of work has gone behind connecting the dots, which in reality might not be the case. However, most conspiracy theories cannot be proved, so they are scrapped and in the process some of the theories which may actually hold some truth are also out rightly rejected without paying heed to them.

Although seemingly harmless, some conspiracy theories actually become larger than life and practically hamper the progress of a country. Those living in a society in which myths flourish and are accepted, tend to actually grasp these theories more quickly and when these men reach higher positions they tend to think on the same pattern. So while making decisions on external and internal fronts of the country, they are always wary of conspiracies being hatched by other nations against theirs. This very reason does not let the initiatives mature into something tangible, ultimately sacrificing progress at the altar of these conspiracy theories.

The writer is a freelance columnist and can be reached via twitter: @murtazakazi1

Moving forward into the past

So after running from pillar to post and claiming that rather than opting for loans he will commit suicide, Imran Khan has finally succumbed to reality. The man believed to be adept at collecting alms has failed this time. Neither did Saudi Arabia lend the handicapped economy of Pakistan a walking stick nor did selling of buffaloes serve as a ventilator. The begging bowl that Khan shattered himself is now being put together with a special concoction prepared by Asad Umar which has Elfy and Burnol as its basic ingredients. The famous couplet of Parveen Shakir augments well with the situation and explains the relationship between IMF and Pakistan better than anything, “Wo kahen bhi gaya lauta tou mairay pass aya; bus yehi baat hay achi mairay harjai ki.”-Wherever he went when he returned, he came to me; this is the only appealing attribute of my insincere lover.Knocking at IMF’s door always comes with its own repercussions, the stringent conditions will further put the government in a precarious situation of shifting the burden of taxes on the common folk. The irony is that PTI has set the bar so high that now it has become an insurmountable task for the Government to walk the talk. The masses will not letthe promises once made disappear into the oblivion. We have observed that the government is being criticized for the same things on which people remained silent in the past. Thanks to Imran Khan for spreading awareness, the voters are not an ignorant lot anymore and will chastise the government for every wrong move they make.

Whether it is the crashing stock exchange or the value of rupee plunging against the dollar, red flags have been raised almost in every major sector but government is still waiting for the situation to spin further out of control. It seems that the heads running the government do not have adequate experience which is required to carry the business smoothly. It is being said that government should be given some space as things will eventually fall in place once the dust settles, but the issue is that Pakistan is a country and not a laboratory where experiments are carried out and if things did not go as per plan there will be a small puff of smoke and the experiment can be carried out after rectifying the mistakes. We have already witnessed a complete loss of Rs.238bn of stock brokers at PSX, so with due apologies to Prime Minister and his team the nation is not in the condition to face any more jolts like this and the experiments may be avoided at least in such a fragile economic situation.

Moreover, one of the fundamental reasons for government not performing as per expectations of the people is that most of the energy is being spent on criticizing the previous governments and not on moving forward with their own agenda. The reason that two major political parties were on the verge of being wiped out in the general elections is that they did not live up to the task with which they were entrusted. The incumbent government was well aware of the dilapidated condition in which country was lingering and the uphill task they were to embark upon after winning. Apparently, plans were ready with Asad Umar and others who did not spare any opportunity to tell the previous government about how things should have been done but alas! Those ideas and studies that were applicable when viewed from the lens of opposition are no more practical and will be gathering dust in cabinets of PTI campaign offices without ever making it to the table tops of those who once pitched these plans vociferously on the floor of the parliament and podiums. To much of our amazement those who used to sing the mantra of “say no to loans” in a chorus with Khan are now suddenly more realistic and are telling others that initiatives take time to bear fruit. When they were told the same thing, they dismissed these views as that of an ignorant fool who not aware of current Prime Minister’s super powers.

The people of Pakistan have catapulted a relatively new party into the high offices with a hope and desire for something new that will serve the country, they are tired of the same time tested and failed techniques of handling issues and to make matters worse the streak of gainsaying things is eroding the credibility of the government. Terming the green pastures shown to the masses as merely political statements will raise a fundamental question that what is the difference if old paths leading to failures are still being trodden, what is the purpose of causing this upheaval when kith and kin of stalwarts are still being conferred with important positions in government. Are we moving forward into the past?

It seems politics in global south is nothing more than a competition of telling lies, the better you are at doing so the more successful you may become and the parties which lose should rest in opposition for a complete term until the goldfish memory of masses makes them forget everything negative they did. However, there is always a way out and we can also come out of this vicious cycle of jumping from the frying pan into fire by striving to work and make sure that education takes its roots in the society. Meanwhile the nation should hope that the truck carrying Murad Saeed’s “200 arab dallar” which were supposed to come to Pakistan on second day of Imran Khans oath reaches as soon as possible and with that capital the government may start on its project named “Naya Pakistan”

The writer is a freelance columnist

Get Beaten at Murree NOW!

Murree has been termed as the Queen of Khosar( Hill range), it has enjoyed this title owing to the natural beauty and picturesque scenery. Since the time of the British empire it has been a tourist magnet where people throng in summers to escape the sweltering summer and in winters they head toward the British era town to get taste of live snowfall.

However, things have got ugly in recent past, if you were to go to Murree be prepared to get a beating by the locals who have developed this clout, which is not in control of police or authority. If you quarreled for high prices, you get your beating. If you quarreled for unhygienic food be ready to get your fair share of beating. The positive side which even feminists will appreciate is that the beating is not gender specific, the wrath befalls upon men and women equally. Whether you are with friends or with family, if you dared to assail the exorbitant demands on room rents you have successfully earned yourself a good beating and while they do that the ladies with the men who are being beaten beseech the barbaric men to stop but they are enjoying the spree so much that come what may you cannot escape.

Recently, a video of a lady went viral on social media in which she and her kids wanted to stay at a hotel and she was charged the bill and then kicked out without offering the the facilities for which she paid. If we went back similar stories will surface and even a boycott movement was started by social media activists but that did not bear any fruit.

 It seems we have accepted the beating as part and parcel of our “tour de Murree” and in future people who visit from far flung areas will on their return to their home towns will sit and tell the stories of their Murree tour to friends like raconteurs do and their friends will ask them how was the beating and they would answer, ‘it was the best part” and would recommend others to get a piece of their beating as it has become a trend and without getting your head opened the trip would seem incomplete.

Inception to deterioration of Pakistan.

25 December birth anniversary of two Leaders of Pakistan. One, the Founding Father (25 December 1876) second, 18th Prime Minister of Pakistan (25 December 1949) Indeed, Jinnah was a man of words and deeds. He changed the history, even changed the world map, man who founded Pakistan. On the contrary, Nawaz Sharif has nothing special to discuss expect he is Former Prime Minister and sentenced to 7 years, and now he shifted to Lahore’s Kot Lakhpat jail on his demand. Instead of hope and vigour, there is depression and disappointment among people about present state of affairs. What a pity!!! Moreover, Both are the leaders of the same name Political party ‘Muslim League’ but unfortunately their leadership abilities are like apples and oranges.

 If we still remember Quiad’s vision and ideology for Pakistan then there wouldn’t have been the need for launching ambitious loan schemes to empower unemployed youth, and lure the poor people by  income support programs to combat poverty and inequality .Even we wouldn’t have been labeled as “terrorist country” across the world. Alas!!

Urao Urao!!

This irreverent and satirical painting "Urao Urao" by Hadia Moiz scoff at the incompetent Pakistan's political system which damaged social and moral values of many.In this painting,splattered blood and outline of Pakistan maps with vulture line depicts the marauding politicians of the country. Bordering with these self centered, power-hungry vultures, who became so hungry that they forget the important things to do and are willing to go to any extent.They don't even care if their hunger deprived the common man basic necessities. These ugly,disgusting and blood sucking vultures are actually robbing their own country blind.Consequently, Pakistan has not only faced the economic pain but also enormous embarrassment,when this nuclear-armed nation was placed on a "grey list". Still on their accountability they called themselves pious but in reality they are unhygienic, disgusting and ugly VULTURES.!!!
 

NAB's speed for Opposition & Government..

Speed of NAB to initiate the inquires to end up the conviction in cases of PML-N leaders is in top gear now a days. on contrary for PTI and PML-Q it is in fourth gear. This Selective accountability is not only add fuel and seems that they are only targeted the PML-N or their associates.  Many fellow worker of Imran-led government, are also NAB's target but why they are not investing the influential men and other stalwart of PTI in the top gear. 

Climbing up things will not make you PM anymore.

 The weekend was going all boring and suddenly we had our news channel screens flashing tickers and footage of a man who had climbed up a cellular tower in Islamabad, the capital of Pakistan. Mostly, people climb up towers when their families to not accede to their demands to marry the girl of their choice, the notion has been adapted from the India Blockbuster “Sholay” in which Dharmindar threatens to commit suicide if the girl he wished to marry did not accept his proposal.

However, the man who climbed up the tower did wish to marry someone, he had a grand scheme of things cooking in his mind. He wanted to become the Prime Minister of Pakistan and even claimed to cure all the ills which have beset the country including alleviation of financial crisis within a span of six months. Little does the poor soul know that the nation has already selected a man who climbed up a container a few years ago, he also claimed to turn around the moribund country in a hundred days and he also was as ambitions as him but the problem is that the nation is already regretting its decision and is not in the mood of doing the same thing again , we have finally understood the gist of Einstein’s words, “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, but expecting different results”. So tower man we are sorry!!!

The writer can be reached on twitter: @murtazakazi1